The practice of lay spirituality, in any human condition one finds oneself...
This above all in the awareness that lay spirituality cannot be inserted in any "religious" vein ... There are communities and aggregations for Christians, Mohammedans, Buddhists... in short, for those "engaged" in religions, and that's it! All in all I believe that for us lay life "in the world" is more congenial, also because our research never goes beyond the self and the self is present everywhere and at all times...
The individual I (ego) arises from the reflection of consciousness in the mirror of the mind. An identification superimposition with the observed object. The object is the body-mind that reacts in relation (to contact) with other external objects. The moment that, in self-knowledge, the fictitious identity with the agent vanishes, what remains is pure awareness. It is therefore not necessary, for the purpose of realization, that the images - the world and the observer - disappear, it is sufficient for the false identity with the object / reflected subject (ego) to disappear. This means that the world can safely continue to manifest itself not being perceived as a separate reality, much as we might consider a dream to the dreamer.
At this point the Self and the manifestation of him are seen as the exact same thing while the sense of the separative self (of me and the other) is obliterated.
Ultimately dualism is only self-ignorance. The sage observes the actions unfolding without there being any propensity or intention or judgment in him. Spontaneously everything happens conveniently and consequently to the designated "destiny". Destiny is the response to the natural interaction (and predisposition) of the various psychic elements and aspects involved ...
Since everything happens automatically, there is no "preference" in the behavior of the wise.
Indeed, his own action is (apparently) intentional only in the eyes of "others", since for the sage everything happens by itself. Every event experienced simply happens in his presence and he is the silent and detached witness. His action (or state) can be compared to somnambulism, or to awake sleep.
And also the concept of "destiny" or that of "deliberate action" has a meaning only in the mind of the observer who is still identified with the outside, or rather of an ego that identifies with the agent and with his actions. But the moment - as already said - that this identification is destroyed every other connected concept disappears.
Wisdom consists in remaining immune from delusion after understanding the truth. The fear of action and its consequences (karma) remains only in those who see even the slightest difference between themselves and the other. As long as there is the idea that the body / mind is the ego, one cannot be an expression of truth. But it is certainly possible for anyone, and in all conditions, to know their true nature since it is absolutely true and real, it is the unicum for everyone.
In fact, the state of pure Being is common to all and is the direct experience of each one. Living one's true nature this is meant by self-realization, as the self is present here and now.
The thought of feeling separate is the only obstacle to the realization of the all-pervading and omnipresent Being. And also from the empirical point of view, identifying with the agent (ego) is an impediment to the proper functioning of the psychosomatic apparatus, in the context of global functioning. Therefore, the intellectual acceptance of truth is already a liberating form from the intentional (rational) propensity to act. What is bound to happen will happen.
It is in everyone's experience that struggling with the question is a handicap in finding the answer.
"Whether you continue living with a family or give up and go to live in a forest, your mind will haunt you. The ego is the source of thoughts. It creates the body and the world and makes you think you are a grihasta. (worldly). If you renounce the world, you will only substitute the thought of sannyasi (renunciate) for that of grihasta and the forest environment for the environment of the family. The mental obstacles will remain there, indeed, in a new environment even There is no use in changing the environment. The obstacle is in the mind, which must be "understood" both at home and in the forest. If you can do it in a forest, why not in society? Then why change the environment? You can engage in research even now, in whatever environment you are." (Ramana Maharshi)
"Every path leads to unreality. Paths are creations with the intention of transmitting knowledge. Therefore paths and movements (religions) cannot lead to Reality since their function is to involve you in the dimension of learning, while reality comes before this" (The Last Medicine - Nisargadatta Maharaj)