According to a new research, rejection by a stranger and rejection by a partner hurt almost the same. This is at least the outcome of a study conducted by Anne Böckler at Leibniz University in Germany and colleagues, obtained through a series of lab experiments with a small group of participants.

While the degree of ostracism clearly mattered, being excluded by a stranger, friend, or partner had the same impacts.

Though this new study is one of the first to simultaneously compare the effects of ostracism by friends/partners vs strangers, earlier studies have found that even ostracism by a computer, or someone belonging to a detested group, such as the Ku Klux Klan, has negative effects.

All of these findings speak to the fundamental nature of the effects of ostracism on our wellbeing. Our ancestors’ lives depended on their having strong social networks — and the drive to have and preserve one, is, it seems, still with us.

The study was published in Social Psychology.